‘Tis the season for movies. Especially ones in theaters, not Redbox, or the store. It always is, but this year, perhaps, will be a little bit more. Sorry, I’ve watched the Grinch steal Christmas three different ways this past week, I can’t help it. Anyway, Christmas is the biggest day in the movie box office calendar. Tickets for Sing 2 are already sold out for the entire day in my town. I know because that’s where I’ll be with some extended family. I’ll be sitting in a packed house for the fifth best movie premiering that week. Let alone streaming. And movies that are already out. This is because of a COVID backlog combined with a truncated Oscar season. (Reminder, the shortlists get announced NEXT WEEK. We’re back on schedule boys.) And oh yeah, isn’t there something coming out this weekend specifically engineered to put butts in seats? Christmas is about to be upstaged by another December holiday. Today is December 17th. Happy Spider-Man Day to all that celebrate.
There are a few different ways to approach an article about Spider-Man: No Way Home. There is the eternal spoiler vs. non-spoiler question. I could rank all the Spiders-Man (movies or actors or villains). I could rehash my thoughts on Spider-Man’s place in the MCU and the Sony Spiderverse going forward. All while at least trying to get clicks in the short attention span world of 2021. I’ll give it my best shot.
Spider-Man Means Something to People
I am a Spider-Man fan. Since growing up in the 90’s with Christopher Daniel Barnes thwip-ing around, he has been my favorite hero. It’s not a joke when I say I have Spider-Man pajamas. I will be 30-years-old sooner than later and I still regularly wear flannel pants with a superhero on them to bed. And I’m not alone. The reason Spider-Man has had so many iterations in his Spiderverse is because people relate to the character. He had good movies when superhero movies were bad. (Forget rumors of Charlie Cox showing up in No Way Home, give me Ben Affleck’s Daredevil and let’s see how big of Marvel fans y’all are.) It’s taken almost 20 years of movies, but there is a deep enough catalog of history that Spider-Man can get his Endgame.
And that’s the best comparison I can make for what you are getting into going to theaters for No Way Home. We have a cultural knowledge that is going to come together in ways you can’t imagine. And you don’t want to try to predict before going in. What is my review of Spider-Man: No Way Home? I thought it was good. It is a unique movie where saying more than that, or watching too many trailers, or reading too many opinions, or getting your hopes up or pitchforks ready, or HEAVEN FORBID you gobble up spoilers; it will soil the experience of having a moment in a theater. Sony doesn’t have to pay me to say, please just go watch the dang movie. Then we can all talk about it together.
But I don’t trust you. So I will officially keep this review spoiler free.
Which also translates to short. Ish.
Our Web of Characters
This is what Tom Holland has been working toward. It’s a little sad to watch him go around to promote this movie (but not quite as sad as having Andrew Garfield try to promote *his* Oscar contending movie and have him get hijacked by Spider-Man questions) knowing he is ready to move on. He wants to go do serious stuff. He’s an actor, but he has given Spider-Man just about as much as he can. Which is a really good thing! This Spider-Man has been my favorite on screen since he showed up for 12 minutes in Civil War and he has grown since then. But the actor has been stuck voicing D-Tier Pixar movies, headlining YA dystopian novels-turned-movie 10 years behind the trend, and launching a blockbuster video game adaptation. Tom wants a break and he deserves it.
No break is coming for Oscar Nominated Benedict Cumberbatch. Marvel TV has been setting up his and Sam Rami’s (speaking of old Spider-Man movies..) Multiverse of Madness as a turning point for the next phase of MCU. Except. Weren’t we leading to a Kree/Skrull war thing after Captain Marvel and the post-credits for Far From Home? And what about Kang, our new Thanos? Last we saw of him, he was chewing up the last episode of Loki and already gearing up for Quantumania. Where does the multiverse fit?
Great movie, mediocre post-credits scenes…
Well it isn’t a spoiler to tell you to stick around after the credits in a superhero movie, but what was truly shocking was the post-credit scene wasn’t a scene. My screening got a full blown trailer for Multiverse of Madness and instead of leaving a Spider-Man movie with the words “Spider-Man will return” we were teased that Doctor Strange would. Yeah of course he will. Right now it is on the slate for May 6th. And he wasn’t really in No Way Home that much anyway. Before the post-credits, this was mercifully and shockingly focused on Spider-Man.
Something that now that you think of it, not all these MCU Spider-Movies have been.
Is this really the first Spider-Man?
Robert Downey Jr.’s Iron Shadow has been looming long over Spider-Man in each of his “solo” movies. Homecoming was about their pseudo-father/son relationship and was a cute highschool story about a really really strong and well known…sidekick. And then Far From Home positions itself as the perfect post-Endgame dessert. The founding Avenger is gone, Peter Parker’s mentor isn’t there to coddle him, how will he react?
Leading us to the amazing role in the character’s arc that No Way Home serves. The movie I compared to Endgame a few short paragraphs ago is an origin story, not a swan song, for the hero Spider-Man is going to be.
How Did They Pull It Off?
We *know* there will be cameos. Trailers have spoiled that a few former Spider-Villains will make their return at least. This could have been the most cluttered superhero movie since Spider-Man 3. And that one was so bad and so full of villains that it killed the best superhero franchise we had. I am so happy to say, Spider-Man: No Way Home is a tight film. It has plot and organization. And the runtime could have been longer! Usually by halfway through a superhero movie I get anxious for the story to start, but instead I remember specifically thinking “I want more of this”. I loved every minute, which is the highest praise I, someone leery of ANY movie breaking 120 minutes, can give.
Now I can enjoy what I’m seeing and still see flaws. The humor didn’t always land, and for a movie that brings so much diversity together, the jokes can feel really homogenous. Like even though we have characters crossing years and franchises, and in-universe, dimensions, they all make the same quips. So if you’re into quips, that might be a feature not a flaw, but it’s at least something to note.
And this is where I would put a second complaint. If I had one.
Merry Christmas Spider-Man
Seriously Spider-Man: No Way Home is a triumph in avoiding disaster. And maybe with the state of the movie industry I just had too low of expectations, but this was a tight movie. Certainly the best cinematic MCU since Endgame which I have said in the mirror enough times to summon it at this point. Adults don’t get Christmas vacations like kids do, but I’m still going to try to find some time this week to get to a theater on a random Tuesday afternoon to watch No Way Home again. Happy Spider-Man Day to all, and with great Spider-Man comes great responsibility. Or something like that.
Merry Christmas from InQua Mag.
Spider-Man: No Way Home is in theaters December 17th. And I swear to all that is holy, if you spoil it I will find you. And I will do…whatever Liam Neeson does at the end of that quote. Anyway, hyped to talk some Spider-Man? Check out when our team reviewed Into The Spiderverse! It was good too.
